I see photos of a dower chest on a dealer’s website. It is one of only few known with scenes of a town painted on it. I love the chest, and it would fit in a bedroom in our home. I know it is special. But what it will sell for is beyond my means. I shake my head and for a moment I am jealous of the collector who will purchase this piece of Americana. I ask myself what the point is of training my eye all these years if my bank account is not up to the task. The envy passes, yet it was there for a short while.
I remember a shirred rug a dealer had for some time, again beyond my means. I would have displayed it on a wall in our home with pride and love. I had a bit of jealousy for its purchaser. I missed out on a Thomas Chambers painting (truth in disclosure, I do own a different one) because I was not yet in love with his work when it was on the market. It was glorious, and I am still a bit envious of the collector who can enjoy it every day. I am aware that other collectors might be envious of the Chambers that hangs in our living room. Be careful with what and who you covet; things could be worse.
I think that if collectors and others in the American antiques world are honest with themselves, envy (jealousy or coveting) is more common than we may realize… an emotion seldom if ever spoken of. It seems almost untoward to discuss. While collectors are best served focusing on the joys of collecting and building the best collection they can, doesn’t envy seep in occasionally?
Envy has deep historical and mythological roots. In Greek mythology, Nemesis punished those whose fortunes incited jealousy, while the biblical story of Cain and Abel is an early example of envy leading to tragedy. In literature, envy plays a central role in Shakespeare’s Othello and King Lear, as well as in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby, where the desire for what others have drives destructive actions. And thus, the 10th Commandment: Thou shalt not covet...
Jealousy at its extreme is important because if it festers and consumes someone, it can lead to dishonesty, and ultimately destructive actions. Antisthenes, a student of Socrates and a Greek philosopher, said it well: “As iron is eaten away by rust, so the envious are consumed by their own passion.” The message is clear: a heart finds peace and fulfillment in what one has, rather than in what others possess. Collectors would be wise to pay heed. To be sure, I do so, but...
Being more parsimonious than Dante, I propose only three circles of envy in collecting (and dealing). The circle nearest the surface is characterized by mild admiration or wistful longing— “I wish I had found that first.” A collector might feel a twinge of envy when a friend stumbles upon a rare find at a bargain price. This kind of envy often comes with a sense of camaraderie—an acknowledgment that the thrill of the hunt sometimes favors others.
As one descends, the middle circle finds collectors who feel a more persistent sense of frustration and rivalry. They might stew over missed opportunities or quietly resent someone who always seems to have better luck. This can lead to subtle forms of competitiveness—racing to estate sales, keeping sources secret, or even bidding up at an auction just to make someone else pay more.
At the most intense is the third circle of envy, a deep-seated bitterness, potentially leading to grudges, accusations of unfair dealing, or a belief that another collector or dealer is undeserving of their successes. This toxic envy can erode friendships and lead to behaviors like spreading negative rumors and other malicious gossip or refusing to share knowledge out of spite. We are back to “thou shalt not covet.”
Collector envy can be elicited by more than others who have bigger pocketbooks or who found a piece before they did. I am envious of collectors who live in New England while I reside in flyover country. There are many auction previews and a score of shows annually I would attend were access easier. And I can count on both hands the times someone knowledgeable (fellow collector, dealer, or auctioneer) has seen our collection. When such visits do occur, I always learn more about the pieces in our home and greatly enjoy recounting a good story or two. I am resigned to my collecting lot, but it does niggle. As does knowing other collectors have superior scholarship to my own despite my efforts.
I am also jealous of collectors who have stronger relationships with some dealers than I have. While I have done the best I can, keeping in touch via the phone or email, some relationships lack the familiarity of the occasional cup of coffee and small talk in person. I imagine some collectors and dealers are jealous of the media attention others receive, feeling they are equally deserving.
Envy is a natural human emotion, just like happiness or sadness. How does one keep it from taking the fun out of collecting, from consuming the collector, to prevent the slide down into the second or third circle? Simply by acknowledging the feeling is a start, as envy can be informative. While I cannot afford the blanket chest that I love so much, the feeling tells me that I do want to upgrade our collection to a nicer one. There may be others I fall in love with that I can afford and with which I would be equally happy, and so the hunt for one continues. I, like many collectors, can focus on refining and upgrading our collection by adding pieces my wife and I love.
Collectors need to move past the negative feelings of collecting—of which there are many envy is but one—
and focus on channeling the energy that envy generates into productive collecting behaviors. What might such coping look like?
Beyond stories and focusing on putting together an even better collection, a collector can give thanks for the relationships he values in the collecting community. Reaching out to those he has not connected with recently and continuing to learn from those who know more than he can be rewarding. Such connections turn the idea of competing with others into thinking of such relationships as sustaining and inspiring. Envy has the potential to isolate collectors. However, sharing knowledge and enthusiasm with fellow collectors can turn potential jealousy into camaraderie, where expertise and enthusiasm are celebrated rather than compared. The best collectors are often generous with their knowledge, and by embracing that generosity, others can benefit rather than feel discouraged.
I am told that many dealers are envious of the position auctioneers find themselves in today. Old timers still talk about the days when the salesrooms were the exclusive domain of dealers, from whom collectors later purchased, in a hierarchical market. I believe collectors will find the most consistent long-term success acquiring from dealers or working with them. But there are many factors that have led to the Americana market becoming an auction-driven marketplace, and envy may simply be nostalgia. The auction business comes with its own labyrinth of complications and expenses, not to mention any given dealer can start one up tomorrow, as some have.
Collectors can move beyond envy and reframe it as educational. Instead of feeling resentment toward someone with a more extensive or prestigious collection, like the collector who purchases the dower chest I like so much, for example, collectors can study how other such collectors build their collections. Did they specialize in a niche? Did they cultivate relationships with dealers? Are they especially good at uncovering pieces with hidden value? Viewing successful collectors as mentors rather than rivals can be both humbling and educational.
As collectors go about their collecting over time many develop a rather good eye. They probably have pieces in their collection others passed by. Rather than measuring success against someone else’s collection, collectors can shift their focus to their own journey. Every collection has a personal story. Whether it is a first major acquisition, a particularly lucky find, or an item with unexpected historical significance, these moments create a collection’s identity. By reflecting on these experiences, a collector can find pride and joy in what he has accomplished rather than dwelling on what he has missed out on and the collectors who live with these pieces.
Valuing the treasures he lives with daily is well within a collector’s control by appreciating those pieces in their collections that are special. My wife and I own three blanket chests. One is very nice and has a great story to accompany it. Why not focus on that? “How lucky we are,” I should say to myself as I repeat that message now and again. Cultivating an appreciation for the history, craftsmanship, and personal connections to objects can help shift focus away from what others have and toward the richness of one’s own collection. I probably do not do a “deep dive” into pieces in our collection often enough and it would be rewarding for me to do so.
In brief, recognizing envy and trying to understand it can identify a collector’s aspirations and what he values. He can then channel what he learns from his feelings into his collecting in positive ways. Envy plays a fascinating role in collecting. The desire for what someone else has—the rare piece, the coveted treasure, more knowledge—can fuel passion instead of a loss of joy in the hunt itself. My moments of envy have no power over me. The key lies in only a bit of jealousy for a bit of time.
An important lesson: envy can fuel motivation and deepen appreciation for collecting, as it does for me and many collectors, or it can become corrosive. Envy is universal from the Old Testament and Shakespeare to standing in line waiting for a show to open or visiting a dealer’s shop. My advice to collectors: “Do what you can, with what you’ve got, where you are” (attributed to Teddy Roosevelt who in his autobiography attributed it to Squire Bill Widener, an influential community member of Widener’s Valley, Virginia). Or improve “where you are” such as increasing knowledge of the market and number of mentors, one’s scholarship, connections, and the like. And if a collector’s envy begins to descend to the second or third circle, he has work to do lest he be consumed.
Originally published in the October 2026 issue of Maine Antique Digest. © 2026 Maine Antique Digest
